So my good buddy from the way back posed a question on Facebook the other day and then took it away before I had a chance to respond :) So, I thought hmmmm, this might be a fun question to tackle here on the blog page! So the question was, "does anyone have any insight into possible negative impacts caused from competition?" Or something along those lines. I personally think that this is a fantastic question and one that my own personal answer for has changed over the years. There are both positive and negative aspects to competitiveness. Our very survival depends on our competitive nature, otherwise we would not strive for better jobs, education, or be able to obtain many things that we need for life. There are negatives as well, particularly in a psychological sense.
Early on in my adult life, particularly from my ungrad days until my mid-20's I was all about competition, as I had just gotten out of college and was full-steam-ahead into bodybuilding, so I constantly found myself in competition with everyoone else in the gym, as well with myself. What ended up happening was I found myself getting more and more frustrated because I just couldn't seem to acheive that "perfect" bodybuilder's body that I was working so hard for. I became very self-centered as all of my focus was centered on being in better shape than others. If I saw someone threatening, meaning with bigger muscles than myself, I would find something hurtful or negative to say in my mind about that person. Basically, my competitive nature was being channeled in a very negative and self destructive manner. So in the "win at all costs" way, I feel that competition is a very negative thing. Let's say that at least it has the potential to become a very negative thing, as it did in my case.
So let's fast forward a couple of years after my bodybuilding days. Because I had set myself up for utter failure with my attitude and competitive approach to working out, I eventually gave up completely when I could live up to the level of perfection I demanded out of myself. I gained close to 100 pounds and I entered into a downward spiral of depression and anxiety. I cannot say that it was all related to my failed experience with bodybuilding and competitive drive gone-astray, but I can certainly say that situation acted as a catalyst for my emotional state. This lead to self-medicating with alcohol, which in turn lead to even more issues....ugh. Eventually I came out of all of that, and I can say that I gained a ton of insight into self-motivation. Through a lot of self discovery, hardwork, good people like my wife, and yoga, I found my way back and have gotten myself in the best shape of my life! I have a renewed understanding of wellness and I currently compete as a triathlete, with some success that I am proud of.
So that being said, these days I have learned to focus on the positive aspects of competition. It can be used as a way to push ourselves to new limits and to achieve levels of fitness we didn't know we were capable of. But I have to stress that there is a fine line you walk when it comes to competiton. It's easy to fixate on the being better than everyone else aspect that competition has. It's okay to take training seriously and I think that it is imperative that we do. We cannot although become comsumed with winning to the point that it affects our very being and changes who we are. We can't take it to the level that we weigh our self-worth through success or failure of competition. My wife and I this very evening were talking about another old friend of mine that I really can't have anything to do with these days because of his self-centeredness, egotism, negative competitive drive and jealousy. If you think about it, all of those descriptors are totally interrelated. It's sad, but when something as strong as our competitive drive is left run wildly, we can become a pretty miserable person because I can promise you, despite how good you might be, you'll never be as good as you want to be. And that my friends can drive you crazy and make you do some pretty rediculous things to your body. It can also drive those around you away. Just somethings to think about!
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